After the Afflictions, I Have a Firmer Love for God

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6 After the Afflictions, I Have a Firmer Love for God

Zhang Ren    Jiangxi Province

My name is Zhang Ren, and I’m a Christian in the Church of Almighty God. Since I began to know things, I saw my parents labor hard in the fields from morning till night every day for making money. Although they exerted much effort, they couldn’t earn much money after one year’s labor. So my family had been living a very poor life. When I saw those influential people live well without needing to labor hard, I envied them from the bottom of my heart. And I made a firm resolution that I would build up a career or get an official post after I grew up, so as to shake off our poverty and backwardness and let my parents live the life of the rich. However, after I strived for this ideal for years, it was still not fulfilled, and we still lived a very poor life. I often felt depressed and sighed for my accomplishing nothing, and I gradually lost my confidence in life. Just when I was discouraged and disappointed at life, Almighty God’s end-time salvation came upon me. From Almighty God’s word, I knew the root of man’s suffering in living in this world and also understood how to live in a most meaningful and worthy way. From then on, I, lost and helpless, found the direction of life, came out of depression and decadence, had vitality and vigor, and saw the hope of life. Later, in order that those who still lived in misery and helplessness could also receive this rare salvation, I ran around preaching God’s end-time salvation actively. But unexpectedly, during my preaching the gospel, I was arrested by the CCP government twice and suffered brutal and inhuman tortures…. In the dark den of the devil, Almighty God had always been with me, and his word gave me faith and strength, leading me to overcome satan’s influence of darkness time after time, so that my love for God became stronger.

It was one day in June 2003. When two brothers and I were preaching the gospel in a village, an evil man reported us. Afterward, five or six cops came in three police cars. Without asking anything, they handcuffed us, and then kicked and pushed us into the police cars and took us to the Public Security Bureau. In the car, I didn’t feel very frightened. I thought that since we preached the gospel for people to be saved and we had done nothing wrong, as long as we said it clearly there, the cops would release us. However, I never knew that the CCP police are even crueler than those ruffians and villains. After we got to the Public Security Bureau, the cops began to interrogate us separately without giving us a chance to explain. As soon as I entered the interrogation room, one evil cop roared at me, “The CCP’s policy is to be lenient to those who confess and harsh to those who resist. Do you know it?” Then they questioned me about my personal information. Seeing that my answers were not to his satisfaction, a cop came near to me, snorted and said, “You are dishonest. If we don’t give you some color, you won’t tell the truth.” Then he waved his hand and said, “Get a few bricks and torture him!” As soon as he finished his words, two cops came to me, pulled one of my hands backward over my shoulder and pulled the other backward up my waist, and forcibly pulled them together and handcuffed them. Immediately, my arms ached unbearably as if they were broken. How could I, who was weak, stand such torture? After a short time, I collapsed on the ground. Seeing that, the evil cops pulled the handcuffs and lifted them up forcefully, and then put two bricks between my hands and back. Immediately, the sharp pain pierced my heart like numerous ants gnawing my bones. In agony, I kept calling to God, “Almighty God, save me; Almighty God, save me….” At that time, it was just about three months since I had accepted God’s end-time salvation, so I hadn’t equipped myself with many of God’s words and understood few truths. But, with my constantly calling out to God, God gave me faith and strength, so that I had a firm belief within: I must stand testimony for God and will never yield to satan! So, I clenched my teeth and kept silent all the time. The evil cops were exasperated. In order to subdue me, they used malicious means: They put two bricks on the ground and forced me to kneel on them, and then at the same time they lifted my handcuffs with force. Immediately, my arms ached overwhelmingly as if they were broken. I fought the pain to kneel for several minutes and then collapsed on the ground again. The evil cops forcefully lifted my handcuffs again and forced me to continue kneeling. Just in that way, they tortured me over and again. It was the period of dog days. I felt painful and hot, with great drops of sweat dripping down my face unceasingly. I felt so bad that I couldn’t breathe and almost fainted. But that gang of evil cops gloated aside, “Comfortable? If you still refuse to tell us, we have a great many ways to torture you!” Seeing me give no reply, they said exasperatedly, “You aren’t satisfied? Again!” … After being tortured for two or three hours, I felt painful and weak all over, collapsed on the ground unable to move, and even became incontinent. Facing the evil cops’ cruel tortures, I really hated myself for being so blind and ignorant before. I fondly thought that I would have someone to reason with in the Public Security Bureau, and that the cops would do me justice and release me. Unexpectedly, they were so fierce and cruel. Without any evidence, they interrogated me by cruel tortures and tried to fix me to death. They were really malicious to the extreme! Lying on the ground, I felt as if I were going to come apart and could hardly move. I didn’t know how they would torture me or how long I could hold on. Painful and helpless, I could do nothing but keep crying to God inwardly to give me strength, so that I could hold on. Then, God pitied me and made me remember God’s words, “Now is the crucial moment. Do not lose heart. Do not be discouraged. Look forward in everything and do not walk the way back. … As long as you have one breath left, you should persist to the end. Such is a good one.” (from “The Twentieth Piece of Word” in The Word Appears in the Flesh) God’s words gave me great faith and strength. Right! Since I’m walking a bright and just way, I should have faith to walk along it. Even if I have just one breath left, I’ll hold on to the end! God’s word, with life force, gave me the faith and courage to continue fighting against the devils, and gradually I recovered some strength. Then, the evil cops continued to question me and kept stomping my feet fiercely, grinding them into a bloody pulp, but I didn’t feel any pain. I knew that was God’s wonderful deed. It was God who showed mercy to me and sympathized with my weakness and relieved my pain. Later, the evil cops detained us on the charge of “disturbing the social order.” That night, they handcuffed us separately to a big concrete block weighing about three or four hundred jin. We were handcuffed there until the next evening, and then they sent us to the local detention house.

After I entered the detention house, I felt as if I had fallen into Hades and hell. The prison guards forced me to thread colored lights. At first, they ordered me to thread 6,000 a day. Later, the quantity was increased day by day, and it grew to 12,000 a day in the end. Because of every day’s overwork, my fingers were broken, but I still couldn’t finish the task. Having no choice, I had to do threading around the clock. Sometimes, I really couldn’t bear it and wanted to doze off. But once they saw that, I would be beaten up. The prison guards also publicly instigated the prison bullies, saying, “If these prisoners can’t finish the task or do well, you just give them two shots of ‘penicillin.’” The so-called “penicillin” is that one thrusts his knee into a prisoner’s crotch, then strikes him on the back hard with an elbow when he bends down from pain, and then stomps his instep with his heel. Such brutal means can sometimes make one faint on the spot or even be disabled for life. In the demonic prison, every day I did heavy work and got beaten cruelly. Moreover, the three meals we ate each day were even worse than what pigs and dogs eat. The vegetables we ate were radish leaves and swamp cabbage without any oil or salt. (Rotten leaves and roots, sand, or dirt were often mixed in them.) And the rest were a cup of water discarded after washing rice and 150 grams of rice. My stomach rumbled from hunger every day. In such an environment, my only reliance was Almighty God. Whenever I was beaten, I desperately prayed, asking God to give me faith and strength, so that I could overcome satan’s temptation. After being afflicted and tortured for over twenty days, I was only a shadow of my former self: My limbs were weak, I couldn’t stand up, and my hands were too weak to spread. However, the frenzied guards not only shut their eyes to me but also pocketed the several hundred yuan my family sent to me. Later, my health was declining. I was so weak that I began to complain in my heart, “Why do we have to undergo such suffering in believing in God in this country? Isn’t it for saving others that I preached the gospel? I didn’t do anything bad….” The more I thought, the more I felt distressed and mistreated. So I could only keep praying to God, asking God to pity and save me. In misery and helplessness, God led me to think of a hymn of God’s word, “Maybe you all remember this word: ‘For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, works for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory.’ In the past, you all heard this word, but none of you understood its true meaning. Today, you deeply know its real meaning. This word will be accomplished by God in the end time, and it will be accomplished in people in the place of the great red dragon who are cruelly persecuted by it. Because it is the persecutor of God and the enemy of God, people in this place all suffer humiliations and persecutions for believing in God. So, this word is accomplished in you group of people. Because the work is carried out in the place that resists God, all God’s work is greatly hindered, and many of God’s words cannot be accomplished in time. Thus people suffer refining because of God’s word. This is also a part of the ‘affliction.’” (from “God Has Paid All the Price on You” in Follow the Lamb and Sing New Songs) God’s words gave me great comfort and encouragement and made me understand God’s will. Because we believe in God in an atheistic country, we’re bound to be oppressed and persecuted by satan the devil. But it’s worthy and meaningful to undergo such suffering, and it’s permitted by God. Through such persecution and tribulation coming upon us, God works the truth into us, so that we’ll be qualified and capable to inherit God’s promises. The “suffering” is God’s blessing; it’s a testimony of God’s defeating satan and also a powerful evidence of my being gained by God. Today I undergo such persecution of the devil because of following God; this is a special favor to me. I ought to accept it gladly and readily. I also remembered the words God spoke in the Age of the Grace, “Blessed are they which are persecuted for righteousness’ sake: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.” (Matthew 5:10) At that time, I had more faith and strength: No matter how satan the devil tortures me, I will never yield to it and will pledge my life to stand testimony to satisfy God! God’s words, with authority and power, removed my desolation and helplessness within, and relieved the pain of my flesh which was greatly afflicted, so that I saw the light in darkness and also felt stronger and had more strength in my spirit.

Later, without any evidence, the CCP government forcibly sentenced me to one year of hard labor. When the evil cops escorted me to the labor camp, the officer dared not accept me for fear that I would die because he saw that I was skin and bones, no longer like a man. So, the evil cops had to take me back to the detention house. At that time, I had been tormented by the evil cops too much to eat anything. However, they not only didn’t give me medical treatment, but instead, they said that I was pretending to be sick. Seeing that I couldn’t eat, they asked others to pry my mouth open and force me to eat. Seeing that I couldn’t swallow, they beat me. I was forced to eat and beaten by them like a toy three times. Seeing that I really couldn’t eat, they had no choice but to take me to the hospital. After the examination, it was discovered that my blood vessels were already hardened, and my blood was black and pasty and could hardly circulate. The doctor said, “If this man continues to be imprisoned, he’ll certainly die.” But the vicious evil cops still didn’t let me off. Later, I only had a faint breath left, and the prisoners all said that I was hopeless and would surely die. At that time, I felt greatly distressed in my heart, “I’m so young and I have just seen God’s coming again and haven’t enjoyed many beautiful times, much less seen the day God gains glory, but I’ll be tortured to death by the CCP government. I’m really unwilling. I bitterly hate this gang of conscienceless demonic cops, and even more bitterly hate the CCP government, the evil party that pushes reactionary policies and goes against Heaven. It deprives me of my freedom of following the true God. It attempts to put me to death and doesn’t allow me to worship the true God. This heinous satan the devil is indeed God’s irreconcilable enemy, and even more is my mortal enemy. Even if it tortures me to death today, I’ll never yield and give in to it!” In indignation, I thought of God’s words, “The hatred of the ages is kept in heart; the evil of all ages is borne in heart. How could this not arouse people’s hatred? Avenge God, and exterminate this enemy of God thoroughly. How dare it be rampant, and how dare it kick and run amuck frantically! Now is the time. People have long readied all their strength to consecrate all the effort and all the price to this, tearing up the ugly face of this devil, and causing those who are blinded and suffer hardships and afflictions to rise up from the miseries and rebel against this old devil!” (from “Work and Entering In (8)” in The Word Appears in the Flesh) Pondering God’s words, I saw more clearly the CCP government’s maliciousness and cruelty. And I realized this: Now I’m facing a war between life and death, justice and evil. The CCP government tortures me so much just in order to force me to reject and betray God. But God reminds and encourages me to stand strongly and transcend the bondage of death and bear an overcoming testimony for God. I can’t be passive and despondent. I’ll try my best to cooperate with God, obey God’s manipulation and arrangement, obeying unto death like Peter, and bear a strong and resounding testimony for God to comfort his heart at the last moment of my life. My life is in God’s hand. Although satan can torture and kill my body, it can never hinder my heart from believing in God and pursuing the truth. Today, I don’t care whether I can live on, but only wish to commit my life to God and submit to his manipulation. Even if I’m tortured to death, I’ll never yield to satan! When I was ready to give up my life and resolved to bear testimony for God, God made a way out for me, raising up those prisoners to feed me. At that time, I was very moved in my heart. I deeply knew that God was by my side and was with me all the time and that he had been caring for and keeping me, sympathizing with my weakness, and arranging everything for me carefully. In the devil’s dark den, my flesh was greatly afflicted, but my heart didn’t feel so distressed or bad. Later, the evil cops imprisoned me for 15 more days. Seeing that I was already breathing weakly and might die at any time, they had to release me. Within nearly two months after I was imprisoned, I, who weighed over 50 kilos before, was reduced to a skeleton about 25 to 30 kilos by the torture, and was at death’s door. Even so, those devils wanted to fine me 10,000 yuan. In the end, as my family really couldn’t afford the money, they forcibly demanded 600 yuan for my food expenses and then released me.

After I suffered the CCP government’s brutal and inhuman torture, I felt as if I made a trip to the gate of hell. I could get out alive completely because of God’s care and keeping, and it was God’s great salvation for me. Thinking about God’s love, I was greatly moved within, and I felt more deeply that God’s word is precious. So, I read God’s word thirstily every day and often prayed to God. Gradually, I had more and more knowledge of the work of saving man which God does in the end time. As time went on, under God’s care, I was restored to health little by little. Afterward, I began to preach the gospel again, testifying God’s end-time work. However, unless and until satan collapses, it won’t stop disturbing and destroying God’s work. Later, I was arrested frenziedly again by the CCP police.

One day in November 2004, the wind was piercingly cold and a heavy snow was falling. Several brothers and sisters and I were secretly shadowed by the CCP cops while we were preaching the gospel. At 8 p.m., we were having a meeting. Suddenly there was a rapid knocking and shouts, “Open the door! Open the door! We’re the police! If you don’t open the door, we’ll break it down! …” Without thinking further, we hurriedly hid the VCD players and books away. After a short time, five or six cops broke in like bandits and robbers. One of them roared angrily, “Don’t move! Squat down against the wall with your hands behind your heads!” Then, the others rushed into each room and searched the whole house. They took away four portable VCD players and some books on believing in God. After that, they forced us into police cars and took us to the police station. On the way, thinking of the scenes of my being tortured cruelly by the evil cops last year, I couldn’t help feeling nervous. I didn’t know how they would torture me this time. I was afraid that I couldn’t bear their cruel tortures and then would do things of betraying God. So, I prayed to God desperately in my heart. Suddenly, I thought of God’s words that were fellowshipped about at a meeting the other day, “I am full of hope for all the brothers and sisters and believe that you will not be discouraged or disappointed, and that no matter what God does, you will all be like a basin of fire, and will not be cold but can endure to the end, until God’s work is completely manifested….” (from “The Way… (8)” in The Word Appears in the Flesh) “Let’s all swear before God: Endeavor together! Be faithful to the end! Never part! Be together forever! I wish that all brothers and sisters can make such a resolution before God, so that our heart will never change and our will will never waver!” (from “The Way… (5)” in The Word Appears in the Flesh) God’s words shocked my heart deeply, “God comes to the earth from heaven and has gone through innumerable hardships to work to save man. He hopes that man can be faithful to him to the end and never leave him in any adverse environment. I, as a person who is selected by God and enjoys the supply of God’s word, should offer up my whole being to God. No matter what great sufferings and tortures come upon me, I should be full of confidence, and my heart for God shouldn’t change, and my will shouldn’t waver. I should bear a resounding testimony for God, and can never yield and give in to satan, much less betray God for an ignoble existence. God is my reliance and even more my strong rear guard. As long as I truly cooperate with God, God will surely lead me to defeat satan.” So, I made a resolution to God inwardly, “O God! I’m ready to give up my life this time, and I must stand testimony for you. No matter what sufferings I undergo, I’ll hold fast to the true way and never yield to satan! …” Encouraged by God’s words, I was full of confidence and had the faith and resolution to give up everything to bear testimony for God.

After arriving at the police station, the evil cops hurried to the fire stove to warm themselves up, and they questioned me harshly with fierce looks, “Speak quickly! What’s your name? How many people have you preached to? Who do you contact with? Who is your leader?” Seeing that I said nothing, one evil cop showed his beastly nature. He rushed toward me and fiercely held my neck and kept hitting my head against the wall hard. I felt disoriented with my ears buzzing. Then he raised his fist and hit my face and head violently. While hitting me, he cursed, “Shit! You’re a leader, aren’t you? Say it! If you don’t tell me, today I’ll hang you to the roof and freeze you to death!” The evil cops kept beating me up for at least over half an hour. I was beaten so hard that I saw stars and my nose bled unceasingly. Failing to get any result from me, they escorted us to the Public Security Bureau. On the way, when I thought of the evil cops’ fierce beating just now, I couldn’t help feeling a wave of fear, “They laid such malicious hands on me at the police station. If I’m sent to the Public Security Bureau, I don’t know what cruel means the evil cops there will use to torture me. I’m afraid I’ll be in danger this time, and may not be able to get out alive….” Thinking of that, I felt an inexpressible despair and sadness in my heart. In agony and helplessness, I suddenly remembered the experience last year when I was tortured so much that I was on the verge of death but God made me survive miraculously. I felt enlightened in my heart at once, “Isn’t my life and death in God’s hand? Without God’s permission, no matter how satan tries to put me to death, it won’t succeed. In the past, I already saw God’s wonderful deed, yet today how can I forget it? How can I have no faith in God?” Then, I saw that I was really too small in stature and that when I encountered the trial of death, I couldn’t stand on God’s side. I couldn’t help remembering God’s words, “Living in the mind, you will fall into satan’s trap and come to a dead end. Now, it is very simple. Look to me with your heart, and immediately you will be strong in your spirit and have ways of practice. I will lead you at your every step, and my word will be revealed to you anywhere and anytime. No matter when and where it is and how adverse the environment is, as long as your heart looks to me, I will surely let you see clearly, my heart will surely be revealed to you, and you will not get lost when running forward.” (from “The Thirteenth Piece of Word” in The Word Appears in the Flesh) God’s word is the guiding light, making my mind clearer. I realized this: Now God wants to purify and perfect me through such a hard environment, making me drop my own notions and imaginations and only rely on God and act according to his word at the time of danger and difficulty. This is just the crucial moment when God leads me to experience his work. I’ll never draw back. I’ll completely commit my life and death into God’s hand and rely on God to fight against satan to the end. I can never miss this opportunity of being perfected by God.

After arriving at the Public Security Bureau, the cops began to interrogate us separately. They continued to force me to tell about things concerning my believing in God. Because I said nothing all the time, an evil cop flew into a rage, “How dare you play silent with us? I don’t have the patience!” Saying that, he seized my collar with both hands, and fiercely threw me to the ground like pitching a sandbag. Right then, the other evil cops came up together and kicked and stomped me violently. I ached so much that I writhed on the ground. And then they trod on my head and ground it violently back and forth…. I was still not well enough after last year’s cruel tortures, and today I suffered such a brutal beating again. Immediately, I felt dizzy and sick. Severely painful all over, I huddled up. Then, the evil cops forcibly took off my shoes and socks and forced me to stand on the floor. My teeth couldn’t help chattering, and my feet were numb and senseless with cold. I felt that I couldn’t bear any longer and would collapse on the ground at any time. Confronted with the evil cops’ cruel tortures, I couldn’t help burning with anger and being filled with indignation. I hated those extremely ferocious devilish lackeys and the evil and reactionary CCP government. It opposes Heaven and is hostile to God. In order to force me to betray and reject God, it afflicted and tortured me and attempted to put me to death. Facing satan’s cruelty and ferocity, I missed God’s love all the more. For the sake of saving mankind, for the sake of our future existence, God endures great humiliations and sufferings and personally comes to the world to work. He once laid down his life for us; now he expresses the words earnestly and patiently and leads us to walk the way of pursuing the truth to be saved…. Counting the painstaking care and price God has expended for saving mankind, I felt that only God loves me the most and only God values my life the most, while satan can only afflict me and devour and kill me. At that time, I even more felt attached to God and adored God in my heart. I couldn’t help praying to God silently, “O God! Thank you for leading and saving me like this. Today, no matter how satan tortures me, I will do my best to cooperate with you, and would rather die than yield and give in to it!” Under the encouragement of God’s love, although my flesh was tortured weak, I was strong and powerful within, and I never yielded to the evil cops. They kept torturing me until 1 a.m. As they really couldn’t get any result, they had to send me to the detention house.

After I was taken there, the evil cops instigated a prison bully to fix me by every possible means. At that time, I was already covered with bruises by their torments, limp all over, so I fell headfirst to the cold floor as soon as I entered the cell. Seeing that, the prison bully lifted me up without a word and swung his fist to punch my head violently. I was beaten senseless and then collapsed on the ground heavily. Later, the prisoners all came to tease me. I was forced to put one of my hands on the ground and cover my ear with the other, moving around on the ground like a pair of compasses. Seeing that I collapsed dizzily after a few circles, they punched and kicked me again. One of them gave me a heavy punch in my stomach and knocked me out then and there. Afterward, instigated by the prison guards, the prisoners tortured and maltreated me by various means every day. They asked me to do all the dirty and hard work every day, such as washing dishes and cleaning the toilet, and they even forced me to have cold showers in snowy days. Moreover, each time I took the shower, they forced me to soap myself down first, and then had cold water flow slowly from my head to my feet for about half an hour. I was frozen purple and shivered with cold all over. Facing that inhuman torture and affliction, I prayed to God unceasingly, for fear that I would completely become a captive of satan if I left God. Through the prayer, God’s words were guiding me within all the time, “The overcomer God speaks about is one who, under the influence of satan and the siege of satan, that is, in the forces of darkness, can still stand the testimony, and can still keep his original faith and keep his faithfulness to God. In any case, you can still keep your pure heart before God and keep your true love for God. Thus you have stood the testimony before God. This is the overcomer God speaks about.” (from “You Should Hold on to Your Faithfulness to God” in The Word Appears in the Flesh) God’s word is light, the light to save man, making my mind become clear. I realized this: When I’m besieged by satan, it’s just the time for me to have faithfulness and love for God, and it’s also the time for God to perfect and gain me. Although this hard environment brings pains and torments to my flesh, there are God’s great love and blessing hidden behind it. This blessing is the way of eternal life God bestows to man. So, when undergoing sufferings, I told myself again and again, “I must endure to the end and accept God’s personal perfection and purification of the end time. I should rely on God’s leading to bear testimony for God in the devil’s dark den, and pursue to be perfected by God to be an overcomer.” Under the guiding and leading of God’s words, I became strong and powerful in my heart. Even if my flesh was weak and painful, I still had faith to endure everything to fight a life-and-death war against satan, and bear testimony for God with my life.

After being imprisoned for over twenty days, I suddenly caught a bad cold. I felt aching in my limbs, weak all over, and was in a daze. As my illness got worse and the prisoners beat and tortured me endlessly, I felt I could no longer hold on. I was very weak and depressed in my heart, thinking, “When will such days of being tortured and afflicted come to an end? Probably I’m going to be sentenced this time, and there’s little hope of my getting out alive….” At that thought, I felt as if my heart had fallen into the abyss all at once. I sank in despair and misery and couldn’t extricate myself. At the time of danger and difficulty, a hymn of God’s word resounded in my ears, “God’s requirement is not that you have many pleasant words or many gripping stories in your mouth, but that you bear a good testimony for God and you go deep into reality in everything. … Stop thinking about your own future, but do as you say in your resolution ‘to submit to God’s manipulation in everything.’ All those who stand in God’s house should do all you can and offer your best portion for the last part of God’s work on earth. Are you really willing to practice this way?” (from “Can You Really Submit to God’s Manipulation” in Follow the Lamb and Sing New Songs) Every word of God struck my heart and made me feel disgraced and ashamed. I thought, “Before I wept bitterly many times and resolved to be faithful to God and obey his manipulation and arrangement in everything. But now, when God really needs me to satisfy him with an actual price, I fear death, care about the future and destiny of my flesh, and completely ignore God’s will, only wanting to break away from the adverse environment and escape to a safe place soon. I’m really so low and worthless, and my faith in God is too little and my deception to God is too much. I don’t have true consecration to God, much less any true obedience.” Then I understood this: In God’s end-time work, what God wants is man’s true love and faithfulness; this is God’s last requirement and charge to man. I, as a believer in God, should commit my whole being into God’s hand, because my life is given by God and my life and death are both decided by God. Since I’ve chosen God, I should offer up myself for God and submit to his manipulation. No matter what suffering and humiliation I have to endure, I should be faithful to God by my actual actions and shouldn’t have my own choice or demand. This is my duty and the sense I should have. Today, that I can still have this breath and still live is completely because of God’s keeping and care and the supply of God’s life. Otherwise, wouldn’t I have long been afflicted to death by the devils? The first time when I underwent such a great suffering and tribulation, God led me to overcome it. So, what reason do I have to lose faith in God now? How can I still be passive and weak and flinch and escape? Thinking of that, I silently repented to God, “O Almighty God! I’m too selfish and greedy. I only want to enjoy your love and blessings, but I’m not willing to truly consecrate myself to you. Once I suffer a little, I want to get free and escape. I’ve really grieved your heart. O God! I’m no longer willing to continue to be depressed, but willing to obey your manipulation and arrangement and accept your leading. Even if I’ll be imprisoned for life, I’ll stand testimony for you; even if I’m tortured to death, I’ll be faithful to you!” After the prayer, my heart was moved greatly. Although my illness remained, in my heart I had the faith and resolution to never give up until I satisfy God. When I resolved to bear testimony for God even at the cost of my life, God again personally made a way out for me. One morning, when getting out of bed, I had no sensation in my feet. I couldn’t stand up at all, much less walk. At first, the evil cops didn’t believe it. They thought that I was pretending and forced me to stand up. But I failed no matter how hard I tried. The next day, the guards came to examine me. When they found that my feet were cold as ice, without any sign of the blood circulating at all, they believed that I was really paralyzed. Then, they informed my family to take me back home. On the very day I arrived home, I regained the feeling in my feet miraculously and could walk perfectly! I deeply knew it was all because Almighty God showed consideration for my weakness and personally made a way out for me so that I successfully escaped from satan’s den after being unlawfully detained by the CCP government for one month.

In experiencing the CCP government’s two times of arrests and brutal tortures, although I suffered a little in my flesh and even nearly died, those two uncommon experiences became a firm foundation on the way of my believing in God. In sufferings and tribulations, Almighty God gave me the most practical watering of the truth and life supply. It caused me to see clearly the CCP government’s devilish face of hating the truth and being against God, know its towering crimes of frenziedly resisting God and persecuting the believers of God, and also experience the power and authority of God’s word. I could narrowly escape death twice from the CCP’s talons and it was completely the care and mercy of God’s love, and was even more the expression and proof of God’s transcendent life force. I deeply felt that at any time and in any place, Almighty God is my only reliance and salvation. All my life, no matter what danger and tribulation I may encounter, I’ll steadfastly follow Almighty God, actively proclaim God’s word and testify God’s name, and repay God’s love with my true consecration.

from The Overcomers’ Testimonies

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The Church of Almighty God | Seeing My True Colors Clearly

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2. Seeing My True Colors Clearly

Xiaoxiao    Xuzhou City, Jiangsu Province

Due to the needs of the church’s work, I was reallocated to another place to fulfill my duty. At the time, the gospel work at that place was at a low ebb, and the situation of brothers and sisters was generally not good. But because I was touched by the Holy Spirit, I still took on everything that was entrusted with full confidence. After accepting the entrustment, I felt full of responsibility, full of enlightenment, and even thought I had quite a bit of resolve. I believed I was capable and could perform this job well. In reality, at the time I had no knowledge whatsoever of the work of the Holy Spirit or my own nature. I was living completely in self-satisfaction and self-admiration.

Right when I was brimming with self-pride, I met a brother at a host family who was in charge of the work. He asked me about the situation regarding my work, and I answered his questions one by one while thinking: He will surely admire my work abilities and my unique insights. But never did I expect that after listening to my responses, he not only did not nod in appreciation, he said that my work was inadequate, that personnel has not really been mobilized properly, that I haven’t achieved any results, and so forth. Watching his dissatisfied expression and listening to his assessment of my work, my heart suddenly felt cold. I thought: “He says my work is inadequate? If I haven’t achieved any results, then to what extent will I have to go for it to count as achieving results? It should be good enough that I haven’t resented this rotten task and was willing to take it on, and yet he says I haven’t done a good job.” I was very defiant in my heart and felt so wronged that tears nearly started falling. Those defiant, dissatisfied and rebellious things inside me shot straight to the surface: My caliber can only achieve this much; I’ve done my best anyway, so if I’m inadequate then they might as well find someone else…. My heart was feeling extremely uncomfortable and I was at a loss, unsure of what to make of it, and so I was unable to hear a word he said after that. In those few days, my situation went from brimming with self-pride to feeling depressed and disheartened, from being very pleased with myself to having a stomach full of grievances. A sense of loss engulfed me. … Amid the darkness, I remembered God’s words: “Peter sought to live out the image of one who loves God, to be someone who obeyed God, to be someone who accepted dealing and pruning …” (“Success or Failure Depends on the Path That Man Walks” in The Word Appears in the Flesh). What about me? All someone did was criticize me a little, say my work was not good enough, and I felt upset and wanted to quit my job. Is this a person who is willing to accept dealing and pruning? Is this seeking to love God like Peter? Isn’t what I have revealed what God resents? Not wanting others to say I didn’t do good enough and only wanting to receive the praise and recognition of others—isn’t that the basest of pursuits? In that moment, I had a ray of light in my heart, so I opened up The Word Appears in the Flesh and saw such a passage: “It would be best for you to devote more effort on the truth of knowing the self. Why have you not found favor with God? Why is your disposition abominable to Him? Why are your words loathsome to Him? You praise yourselves for your little loyalty and want reward for your small sacrifice; you look down upon others when you show a bit obedience, and become contemptuous of God upon performing some petty work. … A humanity such as yours is really offensive to speak of or hear. What is praiseworthy of your words and actions? … Do you not find this laughable? Surely you know that you believe in God, yet you cannot be compatible with God. Surely you know that you are unworthy, yet you remain boastful. Do you not feel that your sense has become such that you no longer have self-control? How can you with such sense be fit for association with God? Now are you not afraid for yourselves? Your disposition has already become such that you cannot be compatible with God. Is your faith not preposterous? Is your faith not absurd? How will you deal with your future? How will you choose the path to travel down?” (“Those Incompatible With Christ Are Surely Opponents of God” in The Word Appears in the Flesh). God’s words shot through my essence like a sharp sword, rendering me speechless. I was deeply ashamed and overcome with embarrassment. My reasons and my inner struggles vanished like smoke in thin air. In that instant, I experienced the power and authority of God’s word deep in my heart. Through the revelations of God’s word, I finally got to know myself: In the fulfillment of my duty I did not constantly strive for perfection to achieve the best results in order to satisfy God, but was instead content with the status quo and felt very pleased with myself. God says, “… man will ever be as infants before God.” Yet, I not only failed to recognize that my own situation would be resented by God, I even felt wronged when someone criticized me. I really was ignorant and unreasonable! I was always looking for praise for doing a little work, and as soon as it wasn’t received, all my energy would be gone; I sulked petulantly when my efforts were questioned instead of appreciated. At that moment, I saw my face of hypocrisy. I saw that the fulfillment of my duty came with demands and transactions and was full of impurities. It was not for satisfying God or repaying His love, but for ulterior motives.

In the past, when I saw God’s word expose the baseness of man’s humanity, it never used to shine through in my heart and I suspected that God’s word was exaggerating. It was only through God making it manifest that I had an awakening: To be able to fulfill my duty today is God’s great exaltation and His great love. Yet I did not cherish it or treasure it, and instead I pursued things that had no value and no meaning—being praised by people, celebrated by people, noticed by people, and to have standing in people’s hearts. What meaning do these things have? God says man lives not only by relying on food, but also the words expressed through Christ. But what was my life reliant on? I lived by relying on people’s attitude toward me and how they saw me, and I often worried about personal gains and losses because of such things. A few words of recognition or praise or a few words of comfort or consideration would make my energy multiply; a few words of criticism or a negative facial expression would make me disheartened and lose the power and direction of my pursuits. Then why do I ultimately believe in God? Could it be just for the sake of people’s approval? As God’s words revealed, what I cared about was not the truth, not the principles of being human, and not God’s painstaking work, but what my flesh loves, things that have absolutely no benefit to my life. Can another’s enthusiasm toward me prove that God praises me? If I cannot be compatible with God, then aren’t my pursuits still in vain? Thank God for enlightening me! From my own revelations I then thought of Christ’s being, of how Christ came to work on earth to save mankind. But what is mankind’s attitude toward God? He is holy and honorable, the glorious God Himself, but who really treasures God, who lets Him have a place in their hearts, and who truly gives glory to God? Apart from rebellion and resistance, all man presents is blasphemy and rejection, and yet Christ never makes a fuss with mankind or treats people in accordance with their transgressions. He silently endures their devastation and oppression, without ever resisting, but does anyone ever express praise from their heart for Christ’s humility, His kindness or His generosity? By comparison, I saw more and more of my own narrow-mindedness, how I fussed over things, how I always hoped to be praised by people or be valued by them, and other selfish, despicable and shameless behaviors. Even with such lowly character, I still saw myself to be as precious as gold. No wonder God says human sense has reached the point where it has become difficult for mankind to control. God’s words have utterly convinced me. At this time, a kind of longing and attachment for Christ—the Master of all things—generated spontaneously in the depths of my heart. I couldn’t help myself from praying to God: “Oh God! Your disposition, essence, and goodness makes me endlessly envious. Who can compare to You? What You have expressed and revealed among us and everything You have shown to us are all manifestations of Your beauty, Your virtuousness, Your righteousness and majesty. Oh God! You have opened up my heart and made me ashamed of myself, making me bow my face to the ground. You know deeply of my pride, my vanity. If not for Your wonderful orchestrations and arrangements, if not for the brother You sent to deal with me, I would have forgotten who I am long ago. Stealing Your glory yet feeling proud of myself—I really knew no shame! Oh God! Thanks to Your revelations and protection, I managed to see my true self clearly and discover Your loveliness. Oh God! I no longer want to be negative, and I no longer want to live for those lowly things. My only wish is, through Your chastisement and judgment, Your strikes and discipline, to know You, to seek You, and moreover through Your dealing and pruning to fulfill my duty so I can repay You!”

from Testimonies of Experience of Christ’s Judgment

Recommendation: The origin of the Church of Almighty God, Eastern Lightning

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The Church of Almighty God | Awakening in the Tribulation of Persecution

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30 Awakening in the Tribulation of Persecution

Chaotuo    Henan Province

Since I was very young, my parents had often been publicly criticized on the stage, paraded through the streets, and so on because of believing in Jesus. I passed my childhood in the cold eyes and mockeries of the people in the village. In my childhood memories, the brothers and sisters who came to my home were all very kindhearted and genial. I never understood why such good people should be publicly criticized and paraded. In 2001, when I was twenty years old, my whole family accepted the end-time work of Almighty God. Later, I also personally experienced a nightmarish arrest and cruel tortures because of believing in God. Then I finally found the answer and solved the puzzle I had in my mind for years….

It was on the evening of June 15, 2003. The CCP government carried out a frenzied hunting for the brothers and sisters who believed in Almighty God in our area. I could never forget that night. Around 8 p.m., after a hard day’s work, our whole family had just lain down to sleep, when seven people, including the cops, the village cadres, etc., climbed over the wall, entered the yard, and broke into my house directly, with guns in their hands. They roared fiercely, “Don’t move!” Before we could get dressed, the evil cops pulled and dragged all of us into a room and kept us under control. Then several cops rummaged through drawers and cabinets like bandits, turning the house and the yard into a complete mess, where there was simply no room for feet. They even didn’t miss the grain bin. They scrabbled about in the wheat so that it was scattered all over the ground. They searched out some books of God’s word and many things of the church. They also took the opportunity to snatch a pair of silver bracelets and four silver coins from a chest, which were left by my forefathers. In the end, they pried open the drawer and took away 4,000 yuan in cash in it. My father went forward and grabbed the evil cop who took the money, telling him that the 3,000 yuan was a loan we took out to purchase a three-wheeler, and asked him to leave it. The evil cop forcefully pushed my father away, and since he was caught off guard, he backpedaled several steps and slumped down on his rear. After that, my father got up and earnestly begged him once again. The evil cop grinned hideously, saying, “This is illegal money!” In the end, on the grounds that “it is illegal money used for carrying on counter-revolutionary activities,” they forcibly took it away and never returned it. Half an hour later, I was taken to the Municipal Public Security Bureau with the arrested brothers and sisters in my village.

When I faced the sudden arrest and the evil cops’ imperious and despotic acts, my heart throbbed violently. I kept calling to God, “O Almighty God! You know I’m small in stature. Now I’m very scared. Please keep my heart and give me faith and courage. I don’t want to betray you and be a Judas. May you give me wisdom, so that I can see through satan’s scheme and stand testimony for you.” After the prayer, God’s words inspired me, “Faith is a single-plank bridge. Whoever fears death can hardly cross it. Whoever gives up his life can cross it securely. When man has the thought of timidity and fear, it is just the fooling of satan. It fears that we might pass the bridge of faith into God.” (from “The Sixth Piece of Word” in The Word Appears in the Flesh) God’s words made me understand that when I had the thought of timidity and fear, it was that satan was fooling me and it was the manifestation of my lacking in faith. When David was twelve years old, he could rely on God and fight against the Philistine giant, without any timidity or fear. Today it’s also in God’s hand that I encounter such an environment. I can surely overcome satan as well by relying on God. I believe that God will care for and keep and help me. Thinking of that, I had strength in my heart immediately and had faith to face the interrogation that followed.

At the Public Security Bureau, I saw that about thirty brothers and sisters were arrested there and that half the room was stacked with the church things taken away by the evil cops. At that scene, a grief rose in my heart: What a great loss the church suffers! An evil cop swaggered in. He pointed at the things occupying half the room and bragged, “I’m sent by my superiors. I’ve hunted cultists for ten years. Do people like you want to oppose us? No way!” After the words, he bellowed out a laugh with arms akimbo. Looking at his aggressive manner, I was very indignant: It’s a right and proper thing for us to believe in God and worship God. Why arrest us? What bad things have we done? Clearly, you impose charges, bully and oppress the people, plunder things of the church at will, seize others’ money and things, and arrest God’s chosen people frenziedly. But you blame us instead and convict and sentence us. You’re really confounding black and white and are arbitrary and unreasonable! I spontaneously thought of God’s words, “This gang of accomplices! They come down to the human world to make merry and stir up troubles, disturbing so much that the world becomes cold and compassionless and people live in anxiety. They fool people so much that they become ox-headed and horse-faced, extremely ugly, and do not have any trace of the original holy men. They even want to rule and dominate in the world, and they hinder God’s work so much that it can hardly move a single step and seal people up so much that they are like walls of brass and iron. Having done so many iniquities and caused so many disasters, can’t they just wait to be chastised? The evil spirits and demons run amuck for a time in the world, and seal up God’s will and God’s painstaking effort to a watertight extent. They are really guilty of the most heinous sins. …” (from “Work and Entering In (7)” in The Word Appears in the Flesh) God’s words have already exposed the devilish substance of the CCP government and its lackeys and disclosed their base acts. Today, while personally experiencing the persecution from the devils, I have a practical knowledge of these words of God. Otherwise, I can never hate the devil. Only then did I understand that there was God’s good purpose in all that I encountered today, so from my heart I was willing to experience this tribulation of persecution by relying on God.

Then, they dragged me into an interrogation room. An evil cop yelled at me with an angry glare, “Where did the things searched out from your home come from? Who is your leader?” I didn’t answer them. I prayed to God silently, asking God to give me wisdom and strength, so that I wouldn’t yield to satan or betray God. Seeing me keep silent, the evil cop rushed forward and gave me a fierce kick. I moved back several steps and nearly fell to the ground. Before I could keep my feet, another evil cop gave me a kick too. As he kicked me, he roared, “Say or not? If you don’t say, I’ll kick you to death!” While saying that, he kicked me several more times. He kicked me down to the ground and kicked my body hard like mad. As I wore less in summer, I couldn’t help screaming from his kicking. When the devil got tired, he tried another means. He dragged me up and abruptly kicked my calf hard. I fell to the ground heavily on my knees. After that, he shouted ferociously, “Still dishonest! Kneel down! Straighten your back!” He ordered me to kneel on the ground and not make any move. After a long time, my legs became numb and sore, and my knees hurt as if being prickled by needles. When I made a little move to relieve pain, the evil cop immediately kicked my ankles violently so that I fell to the floor, and then he ordered me to kneel motionless with my body straight. Just like that, I was tortured by them for three hours on end. During that time, I didn’t know how many times I was kicked and how many times I fell to the ground. In the end, my legs were so numb from kneeling as if they were not mine, and my ankles were badly swollen. I kept trembling all over with pain, cold sweat flowing down my cheeks unceasingly. Seeing me like this, the evil cops still didn’t give up. One held my arms, and another seized the hair on the top of my head tightly and plucked out my sideburns strand by strand. Each time he plucked, he said, “How dare you be tight-lipped! How dare you not tell!” Each time he plucked, I felt as if my scalp were peeled off little by little, feeling a heart-piercing pain. I couldn’t help yelling and my tears kept streaming down. The devil also forced me to say words of blaspheming God. I refused. Then he plucked my hair hard until all my sideburns were plucked out, and my temples were stained with blood immediately. I felt so painful as if my heart were pulled out. (My sideburns didn’t grow until several months later. Moreover, the exceeding pain stimulated my brain so that my memory declined and I haven’t fully recovered until now.) The evil cops still forced me to say words of blaspheming God. I kept my eyes closed and ignored them. They ridiculed me, “You pray to your God. What does he say to you?” I fought the pain and said sternly and forcefully, “No word of blaspheming God can be said. If anyone says it, his spirit, soul, and body will be punished forever. He won’t be forgiven either in this age or in the age to come!” Flying into a rage, they turned around and took a thumb-thick iron rod, about sixty centimeters long, and beat my knees and ankles fiercely. Immediately, my bones ached unbearably as if they were broken. I couldn’t help trying to curl up and dodge, yet my legs were already out of my control. I collapsed on the ground. They beat my knees and ankles fiercely with the iron rod. I didn’t know how long they beat me, and finally I screamed and fainted…. When I woke up, I found I was wet through. They poured one more basin of cold water on me and then dragged me, who was at the last gasp, into the cell. At that time, I was weak and limp all over and even didn’t have the strength to stand up. I was very weak in my heart, feeling as if I were dying. I could only keep calling to God in my heart. At that time, God’s words guided and inspired me, “As long as you have one breath left, God will not let you die. …” (from “The Sixth Piece of Word” in The Word Appears in the Flesh) God’s words encouraged me and gave me great strength. I realized that my life was in God’s hand but not in those devils’ hand, and that without God’s permission, I wouldn’t die no matter how the devils afflicted me. Thinking of that, I was full of faith in God again and felt that it was nothing for me to suffer this. And I was no longer afraid in my heart.

After I was dragged into the cell, I collapsed to the floor. My body ached from head to feet so much that I dared not feel or touch it. I heard an evil cop instigate the prisoners, saying, “This little bastard is a cultist. He’s not honest. Fix him hard!” Right after he finished the words, I was covered by a dirty and smelly sheet. A group of prisoners rushed on me and began to strike and kick me. I was already black and blue all over; beaten by them violently, I felt so painful that I let out heartrending screams. But they shouted excitedly, “Beat him! Beat him! Beat him hard!” I huddled up with my hands holding my head, and cried with groans, “Stop it! Stop it!” But no matter how I cried, it was in vain. In despair, I could only call to God, “God! Please save me. I’ll be beaten to death!” I thought to myself: I don’t know these people before and bear them no grudge. Why do they lay such murderous hands on me? On hearing that I’m a believer in God, they treat me as their enemy. God! Why is it so difficult to believe in you in this country? When I was a child, I was discriminated and cold-shouldered because my parents believed in God. Today I’m beaten black and blue because I believe in God. Now I see the CCP government’s base means of murdering with a borrowed knife and see clearly its devilish substance of being hostile to God. O God, thank you for making me have discernment. Although I’m in the devil’s den, I’ll never yield to the forces of darkness. As my whole being is from you, I’m willing to live for you once. Even if I have to lay down my life for you, I’m willing to do so! When I made a firm resolution to submit to God’s manipulation, God made a way out for me. I heard one prisoner say, “Stop beating him. If we beat him to death, we’ll all be involved!” I lay on the ground motionless, feeling as if I were going to die. A prisoner kicked my head and roared at me, “Fuck off to the commode!” Enduring the pain, I moved over bit by bit with my hands clinging to the floor with difficulty….

At night, the other prisoners all slept soundly. Although I had suffered the tortures for a whole day, I wasn’t a bit sleepy. I huddled beside the commode, with a thousand thoughts in my mind. I ached all over so badly that I didn’t want to move at all. Recalling the beating and insult I suffered in the day, I felt as if it were a nightmare. Thinking that I might still have to suffer some kind of cruel tortures the next day, I couldn’t but shudder in my heart. I felt that it was really worse than death to live in such an environment! Fear and distress were around me. I knew that my heart had stayed away from God. So, I hurriedly prayed to God, asking him to give me strength so that I could stand firm. After praying, I thought of a passage of God’s words, “The God in heaven comes to the filthiest licentious land, and he never expresses his grievances or complains against men but silently endures men’s tortures and oppression. Yet he never opposes men’s unreasonable demands, never makes excessive requirements of men, and never has unreasonable requirements for men, but only wholeheartedly and uncomplainingly does for men all the works they need: teaching, inspiring, rebuking, refining with words, warning, exhorting, comforting, judging, and disclosing. Which step is not for men’s life? Although God takes away men’s future and destiny, which step of his work is not for men’s destiny?” (from “Work and Entering In (9)” in The Word Appears in the Flesh) As I pondered God’s words and thought of the sufferings Christ underwent on earth, my eyes moistened. To save people, God comes to the filthiest place and silently endures people’s slander, blaspheming, condemnation, and persecution. However, I, an extremely corrupt person, want to draw back after being beaten up by satan. I’m really too conscienceless. At that time, I seemed to hear the words the Lord Jesus said to Peter: The bitter cup I drank you must drink and the sufferings I underwent you must undergo. God’s love encouraged my heart. Actually, God has been accompanying me all the time, leading and guiding me with his word and being my reliance. Thinking of that, I felt greatly indebted to God and even more hated myself. So, I prayed to God silently in my heart, “God, to save us corrupt mankind, you have endured so great humiliations and sufferings. However, I’m too disobedient and don’t understand your will, and I always want to escape these sufferings. God, you have undergone all the sufferings for us. It’s your uplifting that I can have a part in your sufferings. It’s meaningful and valuable for me to suffer these. God, I’m willing to obey you and undergo the last suffering to satisfy you. Whether I die or live, I’ll commit myself into your hand and submit to your manipulation!” After the prayer, I was full of strength in my heart and had the courage and determination to fight against satan. And the wounds on my body didn’t ache so much!

In the interrogation the next day, an aggressive evil cop who looked like an official rushed in. He pounded the table, roaring angrily, “Where did you get these things? Who is your leader?” I asked in return, “What have I done wrong? What law have I broken?” He flared up at once. He turned around to get an electric baton, came toward me with fierce eyes, and struck my head and face wildly. And he said, “I’m the law! What can you do to me? Today I’ll fix you to death!” Several other evil cops also gathered round me with electric batons. The electric batons, giving off blue light with a sputtering sound, fell on me. The electric current instantly spread through my body, making all my muscles cramp unceasingly. I curled up and gasped for breath, sweat running down incessantly. But those devils didn’t have any intention to stop. As they beat me, they abused, “You said you didn’t break the law! Today I say you’ve broken the law and so you have! The Communist Party says you’re wrong and so you are! This is called, ‘those who submit to the Communist Party will be fine; those who don’t will suffer disasters!’” After hearing their devilish words, I was filled with indignation and reasoned with them immediately, “It’s right and proper for us to believe in God. We don’t steal, rob, deceive, or cheat others. You turn a blind eye to those who prostitute and whore, who embezzle and take bribes, and who swindle and bluff, yet you don’t let off us believers in God!” After hearing that, they were hopping mad and struck me hard so that I fell down under the table. Then, seizing my hair, they dragged me out and pressed me to the floor. The leading cop stomped on my face hard with his feet in leather shoes. At that time my face was already swollen like bread. As he ground it hard back and forth, I felt my head swim and blood flowed down the corners of my mouth at once. I felt a sharp pain in my cheek bone, and my teeth almost fell off. Seeing that the blood flowed down on the floor and stained it, the evil cops forced me to wipe it off with my clothes. After that, they forced me to kneel on the floor for two whole hours. It was not until I couldn’t hold on and collapsed that they dragged me back to the cell.

I lay on the cement floor in the cell and ached terribly all over, as if I were a dead person. The scenes of my being beaten reappeared before my eyes like a movie. I was very grieved and indignant within: The CCP government is simply a big deceiver. Outwardly it advocates “the freedom of belief” and “the freedom of human rights,” but in secret it lays malicious hands on believers in God and uses all kinds of base means. So I couldn’t help thinking of God’s words, “The freedom of religious belief, the legal rights and interests of citizens, and whatever are all the tricks to cover up its crimes! … Why hinder God’s work to a watertight extent? Why use various kinds of tricks to cheat God’s people? Where are the true freedom and the legal rights and interests? Where is justice? Where is comfort? Where is warmth? Why use schemes to cheat God’s people? Why forcibly suppress God’s coming? Why not allow God to travel at will on the earth he himself created? Why hunt God so much that he has no place to lay his head? Where is the warmth of the world? Where is the welcome of the world? Why cause God to expect anxiously? Why cause God to call out again and again? Why drive God to be anxious about the beloved Son?” (from “Work and Entering In (8)” in The Word Appears in the Flesh) Through the revelation of God’s words, I understood what darkness and evil are, what lies and deception are, what confounding black and white, deceiving the public to win reputation, and putting a good facade are, and what the real hell on earth is. The beating made me see again that the CCP devil only allows people to walk the evil way and forbids them to walk the right way. I also understood God’s will. In future, I should see things from the side of God’s word, because God’s word is the truth and God knows man thoroughly. Only God is love and salvation. Only if people believe in God can they have the bright way of human life. Only those who worship God can live out the most valuable and meaningful life. Thus my faith was even more strengthened: I’d rather be imprisoned for life and give up my life than not stand testimony for God! In the interrogations that followed, the evil cops couldn’t get any results, so they sent me to the detention house.

Each day during about three months in the detention house, I was so hungry that my stomach rumbled and my head was dizzy. For each meal, we had thin flour soup, which could even mirror the figure, and a black steamed corn bun as small as a fist, without any vegetables. Every three days we had a meal of noodles which were few and half cooked. There were rotten leaves with worms floating on the surface and there was dirt on the bottom of the bowl. At the beginning, whenever I saw the noodles, I felt like throwing up. Later, I was really hungry and had to swallow them down with my eyes closed. After eating them, I had diarrhea. Even so, one couldn’t eat his fill. If one wanted to have a full meal, he had to buy their food three times higher than the outside price. They really exploited and squeezed people in everything. The “bed” for sleeping at night was the damp cement floor, without any straw. The head of the cell could sleep on the shabby board. The bedclothes were sent by his family. Twenty-five people crowded the floor over ten square meters. When sleeping, we lay there with our heads next to others’ feet and our feet next to others’ heads, and we pressed together tightly. The commode was right next to our heads. We ate, drank, defecated, or urinated all within that space, and the smell was rather awful. Everyone was covered with heat rash and fleas jumped around. Our task for each day was to recite the prison regulations. Anyone who couldn’t remember them would be punished. He had to run with shackles weighing fifteen kilograms. After a short time, his ankles would become swollen and be badly mutilated from rubbing, and the blood would flow down the ankles. If he couldn’t run, he would be beaten.

In the end, they forcibly sentenced me to two and a half years of hard labor. It was not until my family handed over 14,000 yuan to have me serve my sentence outside of prison that I was released. After I got out of the prison, the evil cops had people from the village committee watch me. Every now and then, they came to threaten me, “Don’t believe anymore. If you continue to believe, you’ll be sentenced to ten years!” To escape the CCP government’s surveillance, I led an unsettled life all the time, unable to go back home. I bitterly hated this old devil: It runs counter to right principles; it not only arrests and persecutes believers in God, but deceives and hoodwinks people with lies, with the attempt to make people deny and betray God. It is exactly the root of sin and the source of all evil! The cruel tortures caused great harm to my body and mind: My eyesight and hearing have decreased, half of my teeth have fallen out, and the rest of them are incomplete. At such a young age, I have to wear false teeth and can’t eat hard food even now. However, God’s love has always been accompanying me. Wherever I go, there are many brothers and sisters caring for me and hosting me, which warms me a lot.

Later, I read God’s words, “I remember that God said, ‘When God comes into the flesh this time, it is as if he falls into the tiger’s den.’ That is to say, when God works this time, he comes into the flesh and is born in the place inhabited by the great red dragon, so God comes to earth this time at a greater risk, confronted with swords and spears and bludgeons, with temptations, and with murderous-looking people, in danger of being killed at any time.” (from “Work and Entering In (4)” in The Word Appears in the Flesh) “…all that God does is for your sake and is for the purpose that you will be qualified to receive his inheritance. It is more for saving you and for perfecting this group of people who have been most deeply afflicted in the filthy place than for God’s own glory. You should understand God’s will.” (from “Is God’s Work So Simple as People Imagine?” in The Word Appears in the Flesh) Pondering God’s words and thinking about what I experienced, I saw more clearly the CCP government’s evil substance of resisting and persecuting God. Because it resists God and is God’s enemy, people who believe in God and follow God in China are bound to be persecuted and afflicted by the CCP government. In retrospect, my parents were publicly criticized and paraded through streets because of believing in God, and I suffered from the evil cops’ inhuman afflictions and tortures because of believing in God. In the face of the facts, I saw more clearly that the CCP, this evil Party, is the embodiment of satan. They arrest, publicly criticize, and persecute the believers in God, just attempting to make people all deny God and betray God and thus abolish God’s work on earth completely and achieve its purpose of controlling mankind. Moreover, I understood God’s will. It was completely God’s perfecting of me that I encountered all those sufferings and tribulations. Through that, God let me gain the truth of discernment and see clearly who is afflicting and devouring mankind and who is saving mankind. God’s wisdom is forever based on satan’s schemes. In the tribulation of persecution, I truly knew that only Almighty God is love and salvation for man. I’m willing to offer up my whole life to Almighty God who loves and saves me!

from The Overcomers’ Testimonies

Recommendation: Know more of the Church of Almighty God, Eastern Lightning

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The Church of Almighty God | God’s Love Is Boundlessend-time

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33 God’s Love Is Boundless

Li Qing    Shandong Province

I suffered many hardships in the world. My husband died a few years after we married, and since then, the family burden completely fell on me. I lived a hard life with my young child and was always cold-shouldered and bullied by others. Weak and helpless, I was in tears every day, feeling it so hard to live in the world…. Just when I was in depression and despair, a sister preached Almighty God’s end-time work to me. Almighty God says, “When you feel tired and when you slightly feel a sense of desolation of this world, do not feel perplexed and do not weep. Almighty God, the Watcher, is ready to embrace your coming at any time.” (from “The Sighs of the Almighty” in The Word Appears in the Flesh) When I read it, I felt very warm in my heart. God’s motherly calling gave me the feeling that I had finally found my home, found my reliance, and found the destination of my heart. From then on, I read God’s word every day. From it, I knew that God is the source of the life of all things, and God is sovereign over everyone’s destiny, and Almighty God is the only reliance and salvation of mankind. In order to understand more truths, I actively attended meetings. In the Church of Almighty God, I saw that all the brothers and sisters were simple and open. Being together with them, I felt very secure and released in my heart and enjoyed the happiness and joy I had never had in the world. Thus, I was full of confidence and hope in my future life. To repay God’s love, I began to perform duty in the church. Unexpectedly, the CCP government simply didn’t allow people to believe in the true God and walk the right way, and I was arrested and persecuted inhumanly by the CCP government because of believing in God.

One afternoon in the twelfth lunar month of 2009, I was washing clothes at home. Suddenly, five or six undercover cops rushed into my yard. One of them roared, “We’re the criminal police. We specially crack down on believers in Almighty God!” Before I knew what was happening, they began to rummage everywhere like bandits and robbers. They had a thorough search inside and outside the house and confiscated the books on believing in God, a DVD player, and two CD players. Then, they pushed me into a police car and took me to the police station. On the way, I thought of the scene of one who was cruelly tortured after being arrested by the evil cops the brothers and sisters described before. I was very scared and felt as if my heart flew into my mouth. In anxiety, I prayed to God urgently, “Almighty God! Now I’m very weak. I feel scared at the thought of cruel tortures. May you give me faith and strength and remove my fear.” After the prayer, I thought of two passages of God’s words, “Those in power look ferocious in appearance, but do not be afraid. That is because you have little faith. As long as your faith rises, nothing will be difficult.” (from “The Seventy-fifth Piece of Word” in The Word Appears in the Flesh) “In all my plan, the great red dragon serves as a setoff to me and becomes my ‘enemy,’ but it is also my ‘servant.’ Thus, I am never loose in my ‘requirements’ for it.” (from “The Twenty-ninth Piece of Word” of God’s Utterance to the Entire Universe in The Word Appears in the Flesh) Pondering God’s words, I understood: I’m afraid of satan’s torture, which means that I don’t have true faith in God. Satan is a setoff in God’s work. No matter how ferocious it is, it is in God’s hand. Moreover, the more ferocious satan is, the more I need to bear testimony for God by faith. At the crucial moment, I shall never be frightened by satan’s despotic power. I’ll overcome satan by the faith and strength God gives me. Thinking of that, I was not so afraid in my heart.

After arriving at the police station, without a word, two evil cops handcuffed me and kicked and pushed me to the second floor. Then, they said venomously, “A person like you deserves ‘superior treatment’!” I knew in my heart that the “superior treatment” they mentioned referred to cruel tortures. At that time, I kept praying to God inwardly and dared not leave God for a single moment, fearing that I might lose God’s care and keeping and thus be taken captive by satan the devil. As soon as I entered the interrogation room, an evil cop forced me to kneel down. Seeing that I refused, he suddenly kicked me in the bends of my legs. I flopped down on my knees despite myself. After that, they gathered around me punching and kicking me, and I got dizzy and my mouth and nose bled. They still thought it wasn’t enough and ordered me to sit on the floor and put a chair in front of me. An evil cop beat my back violently. Every blow knocked my head and face on the chair heavily. My head buzzed and ached unbearably. One evil cop laughed viciously, saying, “Someone has already sold you out. If you still don’t tell me, I’ll beat you to death.” As he said that, he punched my chest hard. It ached so much that I was short of breath for a long time. Then, another evil cop roared, “Do you really think you’re Liu Hulan? Sooner or later, I’ll beat the truth out of you.” Those devils tortured me by various means and they didn’t stop until they were tired. When I just wanted to take a breath, an evil cop over fifty years old came and used soft tactics to coax me, “Now someone has confessed that you’re a church leader. Do you think we won’t convict you if you don’t tell us? We’ve followed you for a long time. Since we had evidence, we arrested you. Speak quickly!” Hearing his words, I was astounded: Is it true? If someone really became a Judas and sold me out, wouldn’t they have known everything about me? Is it possible that I keep silent? What should I do? At the critical moment, Almighty God’s words guided me, “Think about so much grace you have received. You have heard so many words; can you hear them in vain? Even if others run away, you cannot run away. Even if others give up believing, you should still believe. If others reject God, you should safeguard God and testify God. If others slander God, you cannot slander God. However unkind God is to you, you should be worthy of him. You should repay his love. You should have conscience, for God is innocent. When he comes to earth from heaven and works among men, he has suffered great humiliations. He is holy, without any filthiness, but comes to the filthy land. How great humiliations does he have to endure? He works on you still for you. …” (from “The Significance of Saving the Descendants of Moab” in The Word Appears in the Flesh) Every word of God knocked my numb heart, and I was sharply rebuked in my conscience. Having followed Almighty God for years, I’ve enjoyed God’s infinite love and warmth, gained God’s rich supply of life, understood the truth that no one in the past ages could understand, known the meaning and value of man’s existence, and broken away from the painful, desolate, and helpless dark life of the past. God has given me so great love and grace; how could I forget it? How could I be at a loss and even want to betray God on hearing that someone has betrayed God? Thinking of that, I was already tearful. I hated myself for having no conscience and humanity. When a person grants me a favor, I even try my best to repay him. God has given me so much grace and blessing and bestowed upon me so great salvation, but I’m numb in conscience, not only not knowing to repay him but instead wanting to betray him at the time of danger. Don’t I grieve God too much? Then, I felt extremely miserable for my hesitation just now. If someone has truly betrayed God, it is exactly the time God is saddest and most painful. At that moment I should comfort God with my faithfulness. However, the selfish and base me not only didn’t stand on God’s side, but instead wanted to forsake God for an ignoble existence. I simply lost my conscience and sense and my thoughts were all for myself. I’ve grieved God too much and I’m so loathsome to God! In self-reproach and remorse, I prayed to God silently, “Almighty God! I’m too devoid of conscience and humanity. What I bring you in return is always hurt and pain, but what you give me is all mercy and love. O God! Thank you for letting me know what I should do. Now I’m willing to satisfy you once with my actual actions. No matter how satan may torture me, I’ll stand testimony for you even at the cost of my life and never betray you.” Seeing my tearful face, an evil cop thought that I wavered, so he walked up to me and said “gently,” “Speak quickly! If you tell me, I’ll release you.” I gave him a glare and said indignantly, “Want me to betray God? No way!” Hearing it, he was hopping mad. While slapping my face wildly, he roared hysterically, “You refuse a toast only to drink a forfeit. What a cheek! Do you think we are good-for-nothings? If you don’t confess honestly, we’ll sentence you to five years of imprisonment and won’t allow your child to attend school….” Then, they forced me to sit on the floor with my legs stretched. One evil cop stomped on one of my legs, while the other held my back with his knee, and seized my arms firmly and pulled them back forcefully. Immediately, my arms ached unbearably as if they were broken. My head involuntarily bent forward and banged against the desk. Then, I got a bump. At that time, it was a severe winter. The wind was so piercing and it was freezing cold. However, I was tortured by those evil cops so severely that I sweat all over and my clothes were drenched through. Seeing that I still didn’t yield, they forcibly stripped off my winter jacket, had me lie face up on the cold floor with thin clothes, and continued to interrogate me. Since I didn’t answer their questions, they kicked me wildly. Torturing me until evening, the evil cops were all exhausted, but they still got nothing. When they went for supper, they threatened me, “If tonight you still refuse to speak, you’ll be handcuffed onto the torture-rack and be frozen into the ice or even to death.” With that word, they left in anger. Then, I felt a thrill of fear: What other means will these devils use to torture me? Can I hold on? Especially when I thought of the evil cops’ ferocious faces and the scenes of their torturing me, I even more felt painful and helpless, deeply fearing that I would betray God because of being unable to endure the cruel tortures. So I prayed to God unceasingly. Just at that time, God’s words reminded me, “When man has the thought of timidity and fear, it is just the fooling of satan. It fears that we might pass the bridge of faith into God.” (from “The Sixth Piece of Word” in The Word Appears in the Flesh) God’s words made me clear-minded. I knew that I was fooled by satan and lost faith in God. I also came to know that in this environment of suffering, I wasn’t warring alone, and I had Almighty God as my strong rear guard. Thus, I became strong in my heart and was no longer so timid and scared. Besides, I realized that I had too little faith in God and really needed to experience such an environment to be tempered and edified. Otherwise, I would never have true faith in God. Then, I remembered that when the Israelites came out of Egypt, they were chased by the Egyptian soldiers to the Red Sea and had no retreat. They followed God’s word to cross the Red Sea by faith. Out of their expectation, the Red Sea became a dry land, and they got out of the danger and escaped from the chase of the Egyptian soldiers. Today, as long as I have faith, I can also defeat satan by relying on God. Then, I prayed to God in my heart, “Almighty God! I’ll war against satan by relying on you and never be intimidated by the devil’s despotic power! I’ll stand testimony for you.” At the time of danger, Almighty God not only became my strong and powerful rear guard, but sympathized with my weakness. That night, the evil cops didn’t come to interrogate me. I passed through the night securely.

The next morning, several ferocious cops came. They threatened me, “If you still don’t confess, there’ll be a lot for you! We’ll let you taste death! Today even the almighty God can’t save you. Even if you’re Liu Hulan, it’s of no use. If you don’t speak, never expect to get out alive….” After that, they forced me to take off my winter jacket and lie on the freezing cold floor and interrogated me. Looking at their evil eyes, I could only call to God desperately, asking God to keep me so that I could stand testimony. Seeing that I kept silent all along, they became furious. One of them struck the top of my head with a folder so hard that my head spinned. While beating me, he shouted abuses and threatened me, “Let her have a taste of being beheaded today. Where does her child study? Inform the headmaster to bring him here. Let him know how it feels to be worse than death….” After that, they interrogated me about the things they searched out. As they were dissatisfied with my answer, they again used the folder to hit my mouth violently so that the corners of my mouth split and bled. Then, they beat me all over wildly and didn’t stop until they were tired. At that time, an evil cop came in from outside. As I didn’t confess, four or five guys including him came over together, unlocked my handcuffs, and then handcuffed my hands behind my back. They had me sit in front of a big desk, with my face parallel with the edge of the desk and my legs straightened. When my legs were not straightened, they trod on them, held my shoulders, and lifted up my arms and handcuffs for a long time. I was forced to sit still as they required. If I moved forward, I would hit my face. If I moved to the sides or backward, I would be severely tortured. Due to their base means, I felt extremely miserable and screamed incessantly. Seeing that I was dying, they put me down slowly and let me lie on the floor. After a while, those inhuman devils continued to torture and afflict me. Four or five evil cops stomped on my legs and arms so that I couldn’t move. Then they pinched my nose and cheeks and poured cold water into my mouth without stop. I was suffocated and struggled hard, yet they still didn’t let go. Gradually, I lost consciousness…. Not knowing how long had passed, I suddenly woke up because of being choked by water and I coughed violently. Water flowed out from my mouth, nose, and ears, and my chest ached sharply. I felt it was murky around and my eyeballs seemed to burst. Due to choking, I could only exhale but not inhale with my eyes fixed, and I felt as if I would die immediately…. Just when my life was at stake, suddenly I coughed and twitched violently and spat some more water. Afterward, I didn’t feel so awful. At that time, an evil cop seized my hair and sat me up, and he swayed my handcuffs wildly. Also, he ordered a lackey to get an electric baton to shock me. Unexpectedly, that lackey came back in a short time. He said, “I only found four electric batons. Two of them don’t work, and the other two have dead batteries….” On hearing that, the devil roared furiously, “You rubbish. Bring chili water!” I kept praying to God in my heart, asking him to keep me so that I could overcome the devil’s various tortures. Just then, an unexpected thing happened. One evil cop said, “That thing is too strong. We’ve tortured her so badly. Don’t use it.” At his words, the devil had to give it up. At that time, I truly felt that God is sovereign over everything and rules over everything and that it was God who kept me from the affliction. However, those devils still didn’t let me off. They handcuffed my hands behind my back, stomped on my legs, and forcefully lifted the handcuffs. I felt that my arms ached as if they were broken, and I screamed on and on. I kept calling to Almighty God in my heart, and involuntarily I cried out, “Al…” At once, I softened my tone and said, “All things, I’ll tell you….” Those devils thought that I would really tell them everything, so they stopped and roared at me, “We’re specialized in handling cases. Never expect to deceive us. Today if you don’t confess honestly, don’t expect to get out of here alive. We give you some time to think it over!” Facing the devils’ torture and threat, I was very distressed: I don’t want to die here, much less betray God or sell out the church. What should I do? How about telling a brother or a sister? Immediately, I realized that I couldn’t do it. If I said it, it would mean that I betrayed God and became a Judas. In agony, I prayed to God, “God, what should I do? May you inspire and lead me and give me strength.” After the prayer, God’s words appeared to me, “The church is my heart. … Safeguard my testimony at any cost; this should be the principle of your doing things. Don’t forget.” (from “The Forty-first Piece of Word” in The Word Appears in the Flesh) Right! The church is God’s heart. If I sell out the brothers and sisters, it means that I disturb the church, which grieves and hurts God most. I should never do anything that demolishes the church. God comes from heaven to earth and does the work to save us. Satan is always fiercely looking at this group of people God has chosen, attempting to exterminate all of them and demolish God’s church. If I sell out the brothers and sisters, won’t I allow satan’s scheme to succeed? God is so beautiful and good, and what he does on man is all love. I can’t grieve God’s heart. Today, I can do nothing for God. I only wish to stand testimony to repay God’s love, and this is the only thing I can do now. After understanding God’s will, I prayed to God, “God, I don’t know how they will torture me. You know my stature is too small and I’m always timid and afraid, but I believe everything is in your hand. I’m willing to make a resolution before you that I’ll stand testimony even if I have to give up my life….” Right then, a devil roared angrily, “Have you thought it over? If you still don’t confess honestly, I’ll let you die here today! Even the almighty God can’t save you!” I kept my eyes closed and said nothing, with the resolution that I would stand testimony even if I had to die. Gnashing their teeth in anger, the devils rushed forward and kept insulting and torturing me by stomping, beating, and so on like before. They beat my head wildly until I felt dizzy and blacked out, feeling as if my head split. Gradually, I felt that my eyeballs couldn’t move. I couldn’t feel pain or hear anything clearly, only feeling that their voices seemed to come from afar. But I was very clear in my heart and kept repeating a word silently: I won’t be a Judas even if I die…. Not knowing how long had passed, I woke up. I found myself wet all over. Four or five evil cops were crouching around me, seemingly checking whether I was alive or dead. Looking at those evil cops worse than beasts, I was very indignant: Are they the “people’s police” who “love the people as if they were their children”? Are they the law enforcement officials “upholding justice and punishing evil and promoting good”? They are a gang of evil demons and beasts from hell! Then, I remembered these words in Fellowship and Preaching About Life Entering In, “… The great red dragon is most malicious and frenzied in resisting and attacking God. It is most cruel and severe in afflicting God’s chosen people. This is the fact. What is the great red dragon’s purpose to oppress and persecute God’s chosen people? It wants to abolish God’s end-time work and God’s coming again. This is its maliciousness and is also satan’s scheme.” Checking against the facts before my eyes, I saw clearly that the CCP government is the embodiment of satan and is the evil one that has been hostile to God from the beginning. It is because only satan the devil hates the truth and fears the true light, banishes the coming of the true God, and can so inhumanly afflict and torture people who follow God to walk the right way of human life. Today, God is incarnated and comes to its nest to work, so that I, most deeply blinded by it, know that it is satan the devil that afflicts and devours man, and that outside its dark rule, there is light and there is a true God who cares for and supplies us day and night. It is Almighty God’s coming that brings me the truth and the light, so that I can finally see clearly the devilish face of the CCP government which claims itself to be “great, glorious, and correct” every day, have bitter hatred of it, and know the meaning and value of man’s pursuing the truth. The more I pondered, the brighter I became. I felt a strength supporting me within, and I didn’t feel so painful when tortured by the evil cops. I deeply knew that God kept me so that I overcame the cruel tortures in that interrogation.

In the end, failing to get any result, they imposed on me the charge of “disturbing the social order” and took me to the detention house. There, the CCP government took the prisoners as working machines, forcing them to work without stop from morning till night. Every day, I rested for less than five hours and was exhausted all day as if torn apart. Even so, the prison guards didn’t give me enough food. For each meal, they only gave me two small steamed buns, and there wasn’t any oil in the food. During my detention, the evil cops interrogated me several times. In the last interrogation, they said that they would sentence me to two years of hard labor. I questioned them justly, “Don’t I have freedom of belief? Why do you sentence me to two years of hard labor? I have sickness. If I die here, how can my children and parents live? They will starve to death without anyone’s care.” An evil cop around fifty years old said harshly, “Because you have broken the law and we have conclusive evidence!” I refuted, “It is a good thing for me to believe in God. I don’t murder or commit arson, nor do bad things, but pursue to be a good person. Why don’t you allow me to believe?” Seeing me refute them, they got furious. One of them came forward and slapped me, and then he knocked me down with one punch. They forced me to lie on the floor. One of them held my shoulders, another one held my legs, and the third one trod on my face forcefully with his leather shoe. And he said shamelessly, “Today is the time for a market fair. We can strip you naked and parade you through the streets!” As he said, he stomped and rubbed my private parts and breasts with force. Additionally, he stomped one of his feet on my breast and lifted the other suddenly, and repeatedly did so. Also, he stomped and ground my thighs every now and then. My trousers were thus torn, and the crotch was also split. My tears of humiliation kept flowing, and I felt that I would break down: O God, I really can’t stand such humiliation of the devils. It’s too miserable to live like this. May you let me die soon. Just when I felt so miserable and couldn’t restrain myself, I remembered God’s words, “Now is the time for us to repay God’s love. Although we have suffered much ridicule, slander, and persecution because of walking the way of believing in God, I think this is a meaningful thing, and it is glory, not humiliation. And anyway, we have enjoyed much blessing.” (from “The Way… (2)” in The Word Appears in the Flesh) Then, I thought of the words of the Lord Jesus, “Blessed are they which are persecuted for righteousness’ sake…. Blessed are you, when men shall revile you, and persecute you, and shall say all manner of evil against you falsely, for my sake. Rejoice, and be exceeding glad: for great is your reward in heaven….” (Matthew 5:10-12) God’s words corrected my erroneous viewpoint. I realized: These sufferings and humiliations I undergo today are most valuable and meaningful. I suffer for believing in God and walking the right way of human life and for gaining the truth and the life. Such suffering is not humiliation but God’s blessing. I should feel happy and proud for it. As I’m too disobedient and my heart is too hardened, I always regard my own gain or loss and honor or disgrace so important. Once I’m mistreated, I will make complaints and want to resist God with death, so I can’t see God’s love and blessing at all. Then, how can I not grieve God? In remorse and self-rebuke, I thought about my experience in those days. Gradually, I understood: My experiencing such a tribulation of persecution is God’s deeper love and salvation for me. God wants to remove my fragility through this environment and work true faith and love into me, so that I can learn to obey in adverse circumstances, become strong in spirit, withstand storms, and be of one heart and one mind with God unswervingly in any cases, and thus inherit God’s blessing and promises in the end. Facing God’s love and reflecting on my disobedience, I came before God to repent deeply, “Almighty God, I’m too blind and ignorant. I didn’t know your love and blessing but always thought that suffering wasn’t a good thing. Now I’ve known that everything that comes upon me today is your blessing. Although this blessing is discordant with my notion and outwardly my flesh is humiliated and suffering, actually all this is the most precious treasure of life you’ve bestowed to me, is the evidence of overcoming satan, and is even more your most true and real love for me. O God! I really hate myself for being too absurd. Instead of purely understanding the work you do on me, I always misunderstand and complain against you, bringing too great hurt to you. Now facing your love and salvation, I have nothing to repay you. The only thing I can do is to hand over my heart to you, obey this environment with a heart of loving you, and endure all sufferings and humiliations to stand testimony for you.”

When I was prepared for imprisonment and made a firm resolution to satisfy God, God’s love surpassed what I asked and thought and God made a way out for me. Unexpectedly, on the thirteenth day of my detention, God raised up my brother-in-law to rescue me. After spending 3,000 yuan greasing the wheels and handing over 5,000 yuan to the police, he bailed me out, and my sentence would be executed outside the prison. After I went back home, I found that the flesh on my legs was stomped so hard that it became dead, hard and black. It didn’t recover until over three months later. The evil cops’ torture damaged my brain and heart seriously. Even now, I’m still suffering from sickness. If not for God’s keeping, I would have long been paralyzed in bed. Today, it is all because of God’s great love and keeping that I can live like a normal person.

Having experienced that tribulation of persecution, I’ve truly seen clearly the CCP government’s devilish substance of resisting God, and seen clearly that it is the enemy and the evil one irreconcilable with God, thus having a bitter hatred for it. Meanwhile, I have a deeper knowledge of God’s love than before. I’ve understood that all the work God does on man is salvation and love for man, and that not only grace and blessing are God’s love, but suffering and tribulation are even more God’s love. Moreover, I’ve truly experienced that I could still stand firm when cruelly tortured and humiliated by swarms of devils and walk out of the devil’s den, and it was all because Almighty God’s words gave me faith and strength, and even more because Almighty God’s love encouraged me, so that I could overcome satan and walk out of the devils’ den step by step. Thank God for his love and salvation for me. I’ll give the glory and praise to Almighty God!

from The Overcomers’ Testimonies

Recommendation: Eastern Lightning

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